Sunday, December 14, 2008

Southeastern Welcome on Board!

As you already know, Southeastern Asset Management Inc. have agreed (well, has ordered us would be the correct phrase...) to add two independent members to the company's board.
Attending to popular demand (mainly Anil's (the fake, I guess) demand), I'll add some comments on that decision from those people.
First of all, we at the Board of Directors are happy with the addition of those two new seats, specially Jonathan and me. As they didn't ask for a replacement, just an addition of two new seats, we won't have to fight with the rest of the members of the Board to keep our seats, so those are good news.
Second, we are not only firing people, we are also hiring, so this is a signal of recovery (and the shares are again over $4!!!).
Third, those people, although they have not experience managing a technology company, they cannot do it worse than Jonathan, so they might be a help with fresh ideas after all.
Fourth, Southeastern is not known to be a 'corporate rider', so if they decide to take more than a 20% of the company (at a very low price to say it all), it is not likely that they will dismantle the company and sell it by pieces, so this is another piece of good news for all of us who love Sun (well, we all hope that they will keep on with such a history of not being corporate riders and are not taking Sun to start being so...).
Fifth, and this is serious: I really hope they'll stop the massive layoff that Jonathan announced. As we all know, layoffs may kill innovation, and Sun is innovation. I agree this company needs restructuring, but axing almost a 20% of its workforce is not the answer, is just fresh blood to content some shareholders. As soon as I can (as soon as Ashok finishes writing it), I'll publish my ideas of the restructuring I think Sun needs.
Good night, and good luck.


Anonymous said...

Scooter...thanks for the update on SEMA. Sometimes I’m not sure if I can believe everything Jonathan tells me. I mean, I know he’s full of shit, but he sure sounds convincing when he’s slinging it.

Jonathan told me those SEMA stooges wanted to sell off a bunch of Sun's non-performing assets (I got real concerned this meant me, too) and manage the company for shareholder returns. But he told me that he told those suits "no friggin' way…shareholders can wait for their money…you don’t know shit about this business…go talk to some customers, then you’ll see the brilliance of my vision”, and then he stormed out of the Board meeting.

Anyway, I don’t know why SEMA and KKR are so worked up by their losses on Sun stock. In percent terms, I’ve lost a lot more than those n00bs. Jonathan tells me Henry Kravis is just perpetually pissed off because he’s only about four and a half feet tall. KKR and SEMA should just tell their investors the same story Jonathan has been telling our investors, “it’s the economy, stupid”.

Jonathan is brilliant, really. Not many people have the ability to grasp his vision. I mean, by time the the economy turns around, we’ll have cornered the market on free, open source products. I know the margins are a little thin, but we’ll make that up in volume, for sure.

Hopefully Jonathan can keep BS’ing the new board members as successfully as he has the guys you brought on. If can, I don’t have anything to worry about.


Fake Scott said...

I guess I'll have to offer Anil (the fake) a permanent post in my blog.. I'll think about that, thanks for commenting.

Anonymous said...


I'd be happy to come by periodically, say something vacuous, and then leave. Don't expect serious results, though. I do have a reputation to maintain.

The upside is that you won't have to ask me for my employee number, like you do the other posters to your blog.


Steve Ballmer said...

I saw him first!