Saturday, July 4, 2009

Letters from Ashok-Jima

Well, this months are being a total rush: the Oracle deal, the DOJ sneaking in detail into the deal, the JavaOne with my stellar performance with Larry (Jonathon was just there as he insisted so much to be...), the many travels to see the Lakers winning the NBA, sailing with Larry, flying in the fighter jet with Larry, dinner with Larry, golf with Larry...
So, I decided I'd leave Ashok the time to talk a little by himself, as he also insisted so much saying that he has an important message to say. So, Ashok, go ahead.

Thank you so much mista Ballm... (sorry, I have to do a lot of extra jobs to pay the mortgage), I mean, thanks so much mista Scooter.
Along the live of a fake blogger there is always a question made by his audience all the time: who are you really? You can see Fake Ballmer treating the thing very often just saying he is not Steve Ballmer pretending not to be Steve Ballmer...
I am not Scott McNealy pretending not to be me. I always said that, so I won't repeat that story but I'll just write a little about me.
I got my M.S. in Computer Science at the Jawaharlal Nehru Technological University, in my motherland in India, in a moment where the Valley was the promised land, so following advice from some of my best friends already stablished in the Valley I followed the same route.
I had the fortune to join a then young company called Sun Microsystems, and although I was not a friend of him, I worked quite closely with mista Scooter.
I left Sun quite a few years ago, but still worked with them in many projects, and with Oracle too, although I never became a full employee of any of them again. I can't say I met Mr. Ellison, but I once had the fortune to visit his yatch (his HUGE yatch).
Those were the good years, when you could made a fortune working in the business you love.
I started this blog mainly for fun, and for a little romantic feeling that I could change a little the things in the company I once loved and where many of my friends still work.
Well, I also had less spiritual objective: I still have a lot of shares I bought in the Dot Com era, and I'd have liked to recover some of my money, and not just $9,50 per share...

Today, everything is over. I have no more projects so I have accepted a job in the technology area in Bengaluru (well, what you call Bangalore), the kind of Silicon Valley we have in India, and less than 4oo miles from my hometown!
I tried staying around, but Mr. Scooter never wanted to take profit from this blog, although I tried to add Google Ads-Sense or some other kind of advertising to generate revenues, Mr. (fake) McNealy always seemed to be motivated by an ever more romantic sense than me, so he never allowed to take any benefit from the blog. So, here I am, about to say good bye to the Valley just when Sun is about to die.

Just to satisfy the curiosity of some of our readers. I learned about the break-up with IBM just by chance. I have some friends working for "Big Blue", and when you find them on a Sunday afternoon having a few beers in one of the best mexican restaurants in Mountain View, well, it is not difficult for you to understand how I got the information.
Unfortunately for us, Oracle was much more silent and cautious while they were negotiating their deal. I didn't see it coming. Indeed it seems that it was just a conversation between McNealy (the real) with Ellison. But this is a story that will be reported by someone else.

So, is this the end? For Sun, absolutely. For me, I hope this is a new beginning. For the blog, well, probably Mr. (fake) Scooter will be around for a while, to clean his desk at Sun and so on, but I cannot say if he will be posting anymore. I will be very busy in my new job, and far from the Valley, but if I find something interesting to write about or if some Sun (now Oracle) employee wants to write about his/her experience in the transition, I'll send it to Mr. (fake) Scooter so he can post it.

It has been a real pleasure for me. Thank so much to my beloved readers, I never thought you could be so many and so loyal.

In memoriam: Sun Microsystems, 1982-2009.

Well, I don't know if thank Ashok or kick him in the ass (hmm, If I didn't do it with Jonathon...).
If you think that I'll have more time from now on, as my job as (fake) Chairman is somehow terminated, you are wrong: Jonathan and me are so busy (Jonathon is searching for a new home as a retired person in Miami; he doesn't want to retire near California as he is afraid of angry ex-Sun employees...) thinking where to spend the money of our severance package that we couldn't even attend to the burial of the company!
I think I'll hop by Ellison's joint and ask him (again) for a place in the Oracle's board of directors. After all, I deserve it, as I made possible this great merger!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Suggestions from our readers

As I told you, I receive daily thousands of wonderful emails from our beloved readers.
I cannot answer all of them, nor follow all their suggestions and pieces of advice (for instance, I don't remember having played and much less won a multi-billion prize from the Micro$oft Lottery, Ballmer swears they don't have one either!; not to mention the lovely letters from the daughter of the former ruler of an African country that has asked my help to recover the money stolen by her father...).

Well, never mind, I wanted to thank our beloved reader Jim (I won't use his surname, it is enough with the SunId he so gently enclosed in his email), who sent this suggestion:

You need to convince Ellison to spend more time on his yacht so that you can take over the combined company. If done right, there is the opportunity to take a big bite out of the Big Blue Whale and the Toad of the North. A single source for iron, o/s, database, apps, and service is an idea whose time has come again.

Thanks for all the good years,

Well, that is right now what I'm trying to do, so I asked him to sail to the Caiman Islands, as I claimed I never was there before and he seems to have sailed the seven seas.
Jim, I really like how you say thank you. Come to my office when I arrive next Monday, we'll talk about your new position at Oracle.

The only problem of this trick is that while we are away, Jonathan is in charge of the company... Well, what could go wrong?

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Sailing Away!

Yes, I'm sailing away, at least for the weekend. I had an appointment with Larry to adjust some details of the merger, so he said "pal, why don't we discuss it off-shore?" I couldn't say no, he is going to be in charge from now on, so I was going to propose him a cancellation with any kind of excuse because of the bad weather in the Bay Area (if it is only 58 here in the coast, imagine off-shore!, not to talk about the wind and the rain...), when I suddenly remembered the yacht that Larry has...

Nothing wrong can happen in a ship called "Rising Sun".
We are supposed to be back on Monday for usual business, but with Larry you never know...
Anyway, with the satellite phone installed in the ship I can instruct Ashok to post my thoughts as usual. Larry is also planning to install a Datacenter in a Box with some Sun Rays, matching the name of the ship, so communication is not a problem there.

Friday, May 1, 2009

All is calm on the front.

After posting our marvelous results from Q3, many of you were expecting the usual financial perspective email from our friend Lehman. So, as it was not coming, I stepped by his office to ask him if there was any hidden reason why he hadn't posted it yet. Fear not my friends, there is no hidden reason nor it is a silence imposed by Oracle as one of the points in our agreement. The reality is that after what happened to Sun, and being called Lehman, the guy is quite worried about his future and as he told me a few minutes ago: "Boss -he still calls me that, I really like it-, I'm terrified about my future, so I'm brushing up my resume and calling all the headhunters in the Valley. I'd better start right now, and maybe in a year or so I'll be earning enough to pay the mortgage".

So, there is no conspiracy of silence. It is just business as usual.

Now excuse me, I have to deal with the transition team. They are claiming the space next to my office, where I used to store the golf clubs. I need them to play with Larry.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Playing in the Titanic Orchestra.

Have you ever thought how should have been a member of the Titanic Orchestra? They played all along while the ship was sinking, until the end, the didn't stop doing it despite they knew their fate.
Well, if you want to know what it feels like, I'd suggest you to join Sun, but Oracle has stopped all hiring of new employees (also firings, although it is too late for so many good people...).
We know our days are numbered, but here we are, today we'll post the quarterly results (analysts are debating between those who think we'll post loses, and those who say we'll post huge loses).

I wonder how would MLP look with one of those hats. With Larry you should not play those kinds of jokes. But with Jonathan...

Well, here we are, waiting to our fate to come, relying in Oracle's mercy, as from our leaders at Sun only silence can be expected.
Oh, I really liked the SORE proposed new ticked for Sun. Soracle, what an occurrence... Larry is still laughing (then he added something like 'we'll make nobody will ever remember the Sun Microsystems name' or something like that; this is what happens when he spends too much time at the Gym).

Well, at least it will be funny to see those guys at Sony-Ericsson, LG, Sony, etc., that are using Java for some peanuts when the Oracle sales reps. will tell them about the new license conditions... this will be a quite funny moment.

Another funny moment will be that related to the open-source community, MySQL and free software in general.
Over all with everything related to opensourcing Java. Dear friends of IBM, as you are one of the most interested people about this subject, not quoting exactly what Larry told me the other day, but trying to transmit his idea, he commented something like this: "Opensource? My ass!!" Well, I'm not sure if this was the case, a golf ball hitted me in the head this Sunday and since then I cannot hear pretty well, but you can see Oracle's huge and clear history of opensourcing software....

Jonathan, you missed you last Five Minute Friday (crap) Session, so I'm suggesting a new leaflet to announce the next one. This piece of advice, just for free, my friend:

And now, the end is near, and so I face the final courtain; My friend, I'll say it clear, I'll state my case, of which I'm certain. I've lived, a life that't full, I've travelled each and every highway, and more, much more thant this, I did it... (rehearsing for my performance with the Titanic Orchestra).

What will you do in the shareholders meeting?

Well, it seems that my sessions with Dr. Jack Daniels are going to the same place where most of the jobs of the people working at Sun by now, so I decided to change therapist.

Meanwhile, as I try to defeat my growing depression, I'll leave you a new poll. As you know, the shareholders have to approve (or not...) the merger of the company with Oracle (yes, I know, they are buying us out of the market, but if I say merger is less painful). After the gentleman (I am making a terrible effort not to calling them crappy bastards, as I'm a gentleman too, I won't) of Southeastern Asset Management sold its 22% of the company, we don't know to whom, there is a little bit of uncertainty about the result of the voting, so, I'm asking you, fellow shareholders of Sun shares: Will you vote for or _AGAINST_ the selling of the company to Oracle?
I won't tell you my vote to not bias your decision, although I guess you already know what I'll be doing...

Have a nice weekend.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The Rats Abandon the Ship

Well, what can I say, I just read the comments you, fellow workers, left on my previous article. I'm humbled, I'm thankful for coming and reading me, I'm amazed, what more can I say... Thank you.
(fake) Anil, I count on you too, I hope to see you around, and maybe one day we'll have a few beers too.

Yesterday I was so depressed I thought of abandoning the blog and not coming again, but after some therapy with Mr. Daniels, Jack Daniels, I've realized that only the rats abandon the ship when they think it is sinking. I'm not a rat (perhaps a little mouse, but not a rat), so I'll keep on coming around here -when I take a rest from brushing up my resume and sending it to all the headhunters I know- to say what I think and to hear what you say. Thank you again folks. If (real) Scooter had the guts, what an army he could lead!

Well, talking about RATS (Real Asset managemenT traderS -no, I'm not calling them rats, I'd never insult anybody, no matter how mad I feel, I'd never call those people scum, pundits, bandits, traitors, nor any other offensive word you could imagine- ): Southeastern Asset Management (I won't call them SAM 'cause I have a friend called Sam and I appreciate him too much to compare him with those "gentleman") has sold ALL the shares they had from Sun, at prices between 9.04 and 9.09 dollars.

Well, maybe I'm not quite good at maths, but this means that if they had waited until the closure of the Oracle deal they'd earned about $80 million more... not to mention that they bought the cheapest Sun's shares at about $12 (that makes about $500 million...).
Well, I can earn a new living as financial advisor: dear customers, don't trust in O. Mason Hawkins (the man that leads that band of smugglers, I mean, investors), at least leaving the money to Mr. Madoff you had the hope to get your money back. With Southeastern you know you'll loose it.
I hope they don't have any position in Jack Daniels, as we all have seen what they meant when they said they were a long-term investor in Sun...

So, after the maths lesson, now we have to call a detective to find out what is happening here... Why have Southeaster sold all the shares so soon, loosing so many money? Aren't they afraid of the legal actions their stakeholders may take against them, as we were threatened after the (speculated) rejection of the IBM offer.

Maybe we are just told a part of the story, what they want us to swallow. Maybe it wasn't Southeaster who were selling the company to each and every company in the World and have just taken the money as soon as they had an opportunity, as they are not sure at last if the deal will be completed at last (which, to certain extend would be a relieve for me in the personal side, but would be the final lost of credibility for the company).
Maybe it was just a couple of old friends, a powerful CEO and an ex-powerful ex-CEO, spending a weekend sailing in the gorgeous yatch of the CEO, talking about the glory days, and how they could merge their companies to become the next Borg. In the meantime, they'd only had to allow the hardware maker to decline little by little, assimilating competitors of the software maker to avoid suspicions from the antitrust authorities. They'd choose a dumb or better, a dumber CEO to be the puppet in the hands of the ex-CEO, so the deciline of the hardware maker would be, apparently, irreversible, and so nobody would be opposite to the merger. The final dramatic act would be to deceive the Borg, or even the Original Borg, so it would be neccesary the appearance of a white knight (well, or a red and white one) to save the struggling hardware maker, and thus putting a happy ending to the story.
I guess after this job as a blogger they'll offer me to write the new Harry Potter book, at least.

Well, this is just a story, a speculation, and as you know, Sun donesn't comment on speculations. Now that the biggest part of the shares was sold, and we don't know who, it would be fun to see the acquisiton rejected in the shareholders meeting... This would mean that we would see our marketing team doing something we never saw them doing in the past 10 years: working.

LinkNow that we are talking about ships, I'll add some comments about the Titanic and the pathetic music band playing while the ship is sinking, as if nothing was happening at all.
By the way, as I was in therapy with mr. Daniels I lost the town-hall with Oracle at the Menlo Park Campus (yes, I know it was at 8 AM, but Mr. Daniels wakes up early for his sessions...), so if you attended I guess it will be fun if you leave your comments and impressions on what they said they are gonna do with Sun.

May the force be with you (never the schwartz).

Monday, April 20, 2009

Sun is Dead. Long Live the New Borg!!

So, this is the end (or quite so, sometimes miracles happen). After the Borg and the Original Borg, Sun has died to create the New Borg with Oracle.

You don't know how sad I feel at this very moment. I, like most of you, had really believed that Sun's management was working hard because the company was viable. Why so much suffering, so many people fired, so many restructuring, to give all away at last?

Indeed this is a process that has been planned from a long, long, long time ago: the MySQL acquisition was only an excuse to eliminate a long-term threat (as if Sun had eliminated Linux before it became a real threat to Solaris; Oracle learnt from our mistakes). The BEA acquisition was another way to pave the road (Sun couldn't buy BEA without loosing credibility, so they had to do it at that time to now consolidate that mddleware with Sun's portfolio). The IBIS implantation at Sun, a complete Oracle ERP/CRM (Jonathan told you that we betted on a full Oracle solution for our CRM, so, don't say he didn't warned you...).

Well, at last, there are some positive sides: most of our hardware and Solaris employees are safe, because this is what Oracle is after: they want to become the next IBM, so they need such people.

Who are the winners?

-Oracle: With just the cash Larry had in his pocket, he has bought Java and Solaris and all the iron around Sun. And in the software area they have eliminated a formidable competitor that was eroding their efforts in middleware and Identity Management.
-Sun's board: as you already know, the members of the board are going to receive a huge amount of money for treasoning all the 35,000 employees and the uncountable number of Sun's customers.

Who are those that don't win and don't loose?

-Apparently Southeastern is loosing money, as they bought most of their share for more than $12, but they seem happy to have sold their shares by $9.50. I don't understand it...
-Hardware employees from Sun. I mentioned that before. I don't know if this acquisition is good or bad for them, so we'll let it neutral.
-IBM: A new big enemy (ORA), but an old one less (Sun), and an opportunity to increase its market share with angry Sun-Oracle customers. Business as usual.

Who are the loosers?

-Sun's software employees (IdM, Glassfish, MySQL...): Well, you should start searching for a new job... This is that 'Lando Calrissian' moment in the "The Empire Strikes Back" when he warns everybody in the Cloud City (hah, get the point?) that the Empire is there and they have to run for their lives...
-Sun's RIFed employees: Sorry pals, there are no plans to hire you back... some of you weren't saved just by 5 minutes... this is saddest part of this whole thing. The damned board don't realize they are dealing with people, this is not a fucking Monopoly Board Game...!!!
-HP: Guys, you are in a middle of an IBM-Oracle sandwich now... I think you are screwed, with no middleware, HP-UX, a kind of zombie, and just x86 hardware (and printers) to sell. Yes, you have EDS... and you'll end up as just a huge EDS, with a shorter name.
-Dell: Well, the Borg is your only hope now, if HP is not faster than you... You are more than screwed.
-Customers: Choice is over. Oracle is here to squeeze you until your last drop of blood.
-OpenSource: Well, I don't know if this is good or bad, but I don't think Oracle knows what is to give software for free or opensourcing a code... It is as easy as removing all the "community developers" that in fact are Sun's employees, and all those 'open-projects' will just die little by little.

-And me: I won't say this blog is over, but I don't think I'll be coming around so often. I have the same agreement that (real) Scott has, but I'm getting fake dollars instead of real ones, so I stay the same way: poor. This is the main problem of being a fake person. I even had prepared the eventuallity of being acquired by IBM by reserving the 'Fake Palmisano' blog... the fake Larry Ellison was already taken (and abandoned a long, long time ago, as far as I know). I don't know, maybe I'll come back to tell you how is the life of an ex-CEO in Oracle, or how Ashok does in the new company (if he is not fired). Or maybe I'll be here commenting on other marvellous happenings and news.
Well, I'll spend some days sailing, thinking, and, drinking enourmous quantities of bourbon.

God bless you. Good luck!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Homage to my loved readers

This weeks have been so intense that I needed some rest.
I just wanted to leave a post here to thank all my readers and workers, indeed co-workers, their efforts, their passion and the number of hits given to this humble blog. There was such a huge number of users accessing the blog, that I spent all the past week refusing Gaagle's offer to add advertising to my pages.
Well, I never intended to do such a thing, I'm not doing this for money, just to express myself without the restrictions imposed by the safe harbor regulations and the SEC and all that crap, and I'll keep this blog in this way (unless I really need someday the money to buy back Sun again, but I count on you, dear readers, to help me so).

Well, I think that the best thing I can do is to write some excerpts from the opinions left by you, my readers (special thanks to Mr. Anonymous, who has left most of the comments so far...).

For instance:

"...Just ignore those idiots who say contradictory statements each and every minute, and continue with the tasks which has to be done to take the company back to its glory days..."

"...that IBM are not in OUR best interest. It [is] time for a Marketing Campaign....How about
"We're BACK and here to KICK SOME IBM ASS!"..."

"...JS..."Its time for you to go!" I think Bill Clinton also said this about the first Bush...and we all thought that about the second Bush...."

".....I agree we need to announce that we are not for sale....and then act like the market leader that we are!..."

"...Keep smiling scooter....and btw when are we going to announce that we are not for sale...our customers are dying to hear it...."

"....but this is the best article I have read on this bloody mess in a while......why don;t you figure out how to blast this to the masses left within SUN.....Also cc the Board..... "

"...Hope Scooter or Ponytail will have a look at these "Basic Fundamentals of Management..."

"...what's it going to take to for our Board to realize that we have almost of all of the tools necessary for success....except you as our leader...."

"...Lets take Sun back to the market [...] all the engineers want to keep working for Sun, not for any other company, specially NOT IBM..."

"...Have you talked to Gerstner lately....he knows how to right a sinking ship.....maybe he is up for a short term contract...or maybe Martha Stewart....


"...Scooter....Please tell us that those Lawyers have left MPK 10 and that the Board is going to put Pony Boy out to pasture!!!..."

"...WE SAY NO TO IBM !!! [...] COME ON SCOTT , KILL THEM [...] Come back..."

"...that our top brass should read Lou Gerstners book "who says elephants can's dance!"...sure if an elephant can dance...a Pony can learn to do the right thing....SAY NO TO IBM!..."

"....then I say Go for it will have every SUN employee behind you to make it work!..."

Even our partners are with us:

"...Now.. go off and fight ! Godspeed with those who dare..."

Well, thanks you all again. As I said, this is not the end, it might just be the end of the beginning.

Friday, April 10, 2009

A couple of thoughts about the IBM affaire

I'm taking a rest from the Augusta's Master (I'm not allowed to play there as they say I earned enough as CEO, so I have fun watching the competitions and assessing Tiger on his return), so just wanted to write a couple of statements written by my great friend Paul Murphy (we never met, but because of the things he writes, I really appreciate, more than this, I love him!).
For instance:

What’s motivating IBM is precisely the opposite: they know they can’t compete with Sun in the marketplace and are using the opportunities created by the moral meltdown in Washington to shut Sun down via the legal and financial systems.

Or this one:

It’s easy to see what might drive IBM to this decision: they’ve got the money, anti-trust in the Obama era is just a dollar issue, Sun’s Unix licenses predate Novell’s and have more validity, and right now IBM can’t begin to compete with SPARC/Solaris on price, performance, reliability, or innovation.

The greatest thing of all is that what he writes is true.

Dear Rahul: Go and tell your people at SEMA that Sun is perfectly viable. We can easily make much more than those 9.50 per share you were about to take from the Real Borg. To achieve that we only need some peace of mind so we can focus in selling our stuff and set pace ahead of our competition in a blink. And you and your friends could help: stating that Sun is NOT for sale. Make a public statement, saying that all the IBM affaire was just a rumor (or don't say a word about it if you rather so) and say that you are confident with the future of the company. And put your money where your mouth is.
You won't regret it.

Have to get back to Augusta, seems Tiger is in trouble with his putt.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Hall of Fame and Shame and Stupid Analysts Opinions

Analysts and false journalists are funnier than ever.
Just have a look at this article by Jane Bads, very Bads indeed (I also know how to play with words, this is how I earned my reputation as a CEO, 30 years ago).
He, you call your blog Funny Business, how funny, if it wasn't because you work for CNBC I might be worry, but now I see this is a practical joke from my old friend (?) Ballmer.
Ballma, if you keep on the "stupid" article, you are not coming to my yacht this weekend. You are warned.

Jane, Ms. Bads, do you know what is stupid? To spend $4 billion buying StorageTek, another $1 billion buying MySQL, and many more acquisitions I'm not mentioning now (check the Wikipedia for a list), and then sell the company for $7 billion to a shark that is going to end with the dream of your life. Can you picture this? Here is a sample of the situation:Much love, Alburquerque.

Well, at least some of our politicians are not illiterate as some of our journalists, a fine good sample is Mr. Ritter, Governor of Colorado, that payed us a visit today. Of course he didn't meet with MLP, we don't want public servants to meet with ex-CEOs. (Ashok, don't write that this way, I cannot disclose such a kind of information in my blog. I know, I know I'm not Scott McNealy pretending not to be Scott McNealy and all that stuff, but just don't do it. And don't publish the notes I give you about what to publish or not).
What I won't tell you is that I met with Mr. Ritter, as we don't want to rise any rumor about the future of Schwartz at the company (although I did, in secret, and he encouraged me not to surrender against IBM as we are one of the major employers in Colorado).

[Unrelated note: Jonathan, Tuesday is not the day to issue the Five Minute Friday video, it is Friday. To say what you said in the video, you could have waited until Friday, even more, to the last Friday of December...]

I won't comment either the departure of Marc Tremblay to Microsoft. This could make people believe that Ballmer has any kind of interest to enter into the computer maker market (computer and real operating systems and software) and hiring Marc would be a way to hire a negotiator to integrate both businesses properly. Mista Ballma, you are such a nasty boy...

Say NO to IBM.
Say NO to Schwartz.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Where to put the dot-com dot

Dear John (uninformed) Whatever (sorry, your name is impossible to pronounce),

Yesterday I wrote about those "analysts" that don't know what a computer or a datacenter is because they never saw anyone, so imagine analyzing something as complex as the economy, even more, the economy related to the computer business. Today you tried to be sooo funny with your blog that you started playing with the words of our dot in the dot-com motto. Ha, ha, ha, I'm still laughing, over all after watching how our stocks raised today more than 6% after reading your article. Maybe this is what the investors want to tell us: to put the dot in the dot com again, or better, in the 2.0 era, as an independent and healthy company.
As I think you have a serous problem with numbers, I'll remind you that before all the IBM affaire our shares were about $4.50, and now, even after IBM dropped the deal, we are still at $6.66 (interesting number to close the session today... What does Scientology has to say about it, MLP?).

John, you are not right in your article: the worst of the options is to by acquired by IBM as this means the death of Sun and the firing of hundreds of workers. What do you think did Mr. Ritter told us in his visit? He asked, pleaded, demanded not to be bought by IBM, as this would mean that his re-election would be endangered by the number of unemployed people rising!!
What kind of a blogger are you? I'm sure you can't tell Vista from OS-X, so imagine if you dare teaching me about a business I invented more than 25 years ago. Why don't you learn from a real professional like Paul Murphy? He is well balanced, not biased, he writes the truth in his articles, and he produces a great beer too.
Paul, I love you. When I take the reigns back I count on you for the PR deparment.

John, whenever you drop by Menlo Park let me know. I'll show you where I put the the hockey stick on those who dare telling me where to put the dot. Ask MLP, he has a clear picture.
And I won't comment on the Gartner analyst that suggest that if we cannot sell the whole company we should sell it by pieces. This analyst is the one that says that "the company is too complex" and suggests that many line of products don't make sense and nobody wants them. Is that the same Gartner analyst that rated Sun and all Sun products as Positive and Strong Positive? Was he drunk when he did the first anlysis, is drunk now, has suddenly seen the light? Or is it only that they say what they think will be accepted by most of the other analysts?
Maybe the question is just money.

By the way, instead of commenting about the rumor of today, I'll advance the rumors of tomorrow: Today we, the board, are meeting to discuss the future after the no deal with IBM, as it was a rumor, and we don't comment on rumors. So the rumors about today's meeting will be spread tomorrow, no doubt about it.

Say NO to IBM.
Say NO to Schwartz.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

This is not the end.

It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.

Oh, I love this kind of phrases, I have to include it in a speech soon (I always loved Groucho, or it was a politician who said that? In any case, a very clever man in a difficult situation).

So, first round is over, it seems that IBM quited their offer, so, now what?

First things first: the board met, and we decided not to comment on rumors, and to stand and support our CEO. Well, you know what it means when a basket of football team publicly expresses support for the coach of the team: they are asking all other coaches to send their resumes in... In this case is my resume the only one they are reviewing, of course.

Some people think that the best option for Sun is to be sold, and that this is just a game to force IBM to offer a higher offer, or an IBM move to offer a cheaper one, and that in any case Jonathan should plea the Original Borg to come back to negotiate again (a sample of suggested Jonathan's pose is in the picture: this was taken from one of his ceremonies in the Scientology church, when he pleads his God saying "you approved the IBM deal, God, why have you abandoned me? Is this a test of my faith?").

Those that say so, that we should take the money and run away, are many so-called "analysts", people that may have a MBA or something similar, and that only think about money, and usually in the wrong way. Even more, they only think as if they owned a stack of shares of Sun, and just think of minimizing damages, not knowing the real status of the company, if it is viable or not, and don't think at all about the people that have worked so hard to build Sun. Those analysts think of people as numbers, so they believe that selling Sun by $10 a share is great business as it was valued at 4.50 before this story begun (at this very moment it is 6.25, so we have even earned some value in the meantime). They don't realize, or don't want to realize, that selling Sun by $10 a share would only report a few profits to a few investors, that most investors are going to loose more than halve what they invested, and more than this, Sun would disappear forever (once bought, a company like Sun cannot live in IBM, this is stupid: is like saying that little fishes live a longer life once inside the shark that ate them), and what is worse: no less than 10,000 workers would be fired. Do you think this is a boost for the global economy? I don't think so, I'll tell my new friend Obama what against open-source this is.

In summary, if Schwartz thinks that he cannot turn Sun to profitability, and that the solution is selling the company, and he is not even able to do a decent sale (for God's sake, not IBM, you could have searched for a company with synergies!!!), we must let him go, by saying him "may the Schwartz be with you". We are in the middle of a RIF process, so saving the $11 million you used to earn will save many valuable engineers we need to gain profitability again.
While I love Spaceballs, I like most "The McNealy Strikes Back" or "Return of The Jedi-McNealy". I'll only be paid one dollar per year, and my real pay will come in the way of stock-options only if I manage to turn the company to profitability.

Second thing to do: Removing that ugly "Tech Company For Sale. Nice Prices. Ask the Board" banner placed at the entrance of our Menlo Park facilities. We must state crystal clear that Sun is not for sale, or our customers will have serious concerns about where are they spending their money on. We must give them confidence on what we do, on what we sell. We can do it, just stop playing in the boards meetings, and keep focused in profitability.

Third thing to do: Just go out and sell Sun stuff to our beloved customers. We have a lot of cash we should spend just in advertising. We are running right now a deep restructuring process to simplify the company, save money, rationalize resources and be more effective reaching our customers. Just keep focused on that.
We have the right products at the right moment, only that customers do not know it.

As soon as we give a couple of quarters of constant growth and revenues, you'll see all those analysts that today say we have to accept any offer to sell Sun, saying that they had foreseen the recovery of the most innovative company of the Valley. That happened back in the 90's when they all said we should embrace Window$ NT, and a few months later they said that they had foreseen the growth of Solaris as the key for the success of Sun.

Fourth thing to do: Read my blog. In the related entry of my blog I already suggested a few measures that have been implemented in this latest reorganization of the company. There are a few others pending (like stopping the layoffs), but I know they are the key to turn the company and to save the Sun we all love.

Hmmm, feels so good to be back on business!!

Say NO to IBM.
Say NO to Schwartz.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

We Don't Comment On Rumors

It seems that tomorrow was going to be the big day, or the last day, as you wanted to see it. Even the scientology emperor of our dear MLP approved the deal (I have to talk seriously to Tom Cruise after this is over). Now, there is another rumor saying that we broke conversations with IBM, and that they are leaving the negotiations because we invited other partners to make offers for Sun. Well, maybe it is not true completely: it was me who broke some vases, but it was because I was wearing my hockey suit, and the IBM guys run away as if I was trying to hit them in the head. I won't say if MLP was fast enough. It's only a rumor.Oh, this is the 'board meeting' suit I'm going to wear from now on... It seems effective to explain my ideas...
Well, maybe tomorrow we'll know the truth. I tried to talk to that guy, Source, as he seems to know everything, but is a hard to find person.

Say NO to IBM.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Resting before the fight.

Well, I must recognize that this matter about IBM is making my blood run wild again, like the old times.
But I've decided to spend the weekend at home, watching some movies and not thinking about rumors (you know, we don't comment on rumors). For instance, the movie today is "The Secret of My Succes$", about a boy that begins working in a firm and makes a plot to avoid a merger from a rival company and buys the company himself with the aid of some investment bankers and part of the board against the CEO of the company.
Does this plot sound familiar to anyone?

Thursday, April 2, 2009

The Fight Has Begun!!! Answer My Poll, Sun Shareholders!!

I'm weighting the support I'd have if I decide to fight against the IBM merger, so I just added a poll in this page.
It is intended for Sun shareholders, so if you have some shares, let me know if you'd support me with yours to avoid this Devil's son, I mean, this mistake of a merger. And do it soon, rumor has it that next week could everything be over. And they are offering halve what they spend on peanuts...

Of course, once I take the control of the company back I'd fire My Little Pony first thing in the morning. No hard feelings. I chose you, I fire you.

If you feel like, you can add comments saying how many shares you'd retain with you or would be willing to sell me (in that case say your price). It would be better to send me and e-mail, but we don't want to fill (real) Scott's account with spam, so I'm sure he'll read this blog and make the calculations.
Again: I'm not Scott McNealy pretending not to be me. Namaste...

On an unrelated note, just wanted to add that the organization we are just deploying at Sun is quite similar to what we had in the mid 90s, yes, that very same organization where the sales people preferred selling Bea Weblogic rather than iPlanet products because they were rewarded the same way, but had no headaches with unsatisfied customers. Live to tell...

Stepping out as Chairman

Our dear friend (fake) Jonathan says in his Twitter that I'm stepping out as chairman of Sun to fight the IBM acquisition.

My comment to this kind of rumor is: At Sun, we do not comment on market rumors. And much less in (fake) Jonathan's rumors.
I know you didn't expect such an original comment, it was suggested by my friend (fake) Ballmer, in line with his own "I'm not Steve Ballmer pretending not to be Steve Ballmer, pretending not to..."

So, as I'm not Scott McNealy pretending not to be Scott McNealy, I will not comment on rumors (at least until it is official, of course).

Jonathan, in any case you won't get rid of me so easily. I have a new hockey sticks set... and I will use them...

Dear One Angry Partner

I do not use to comment on user's comments in the blog page, just inside the comments zone, but I'll do an exception with you.
You asked for some action, for promoting software sales and I guess that taking care of partners more often, so we could detect when you are angry and find a remedy to this.
Well dear partners, your wishes are our commands, so, showing that I still have some power in the company (or had, who knows...), I ordered to restructure the company in three great areas or line of business: Software, Services and Hardware, and have ordered the different managers to increase partner cooperation in the business.

Of course, this is a perfect scenario to chop some more heads (figuratively, headcounts, I meant).

Or maybe Jonathan fooled me and this is the first step to sell the company by pieces...

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

IBIS update: rollout deferred

Well, it seems that the final rollout of IBIS has been deferred a few months, until July.
Does it mean that somebody has finally realized that it is a suicide to do the final step of the implementation of the system in the middle of the final quarter of the FY, meaning that during a couple of weeks no orders from customers could be processed?

I know, maybe the IBIS team is thinking just about a different thing: why hurry up with IBIS if we are going to substitute it quite soon with the one from IBM (no, IBIS does not mean Ibm Business Information System). I assure you not, this is not the reason, as we inside Sun never comment or think about market rumors.

Sun, the rumor company.
(I never succeeded with the 'Sun, the Java company brand, so I'm proposing a new one).

Maybe the real reason is that a great part of the IBIS implementation team is going to be left go (what a horrible euphemism to say we are firing people to try to limit the company costs... and maybe it is the way, but just firing one person would be enough...). Instead of hiring thousands of sales reps. and engineers and consultants we fire them. It is like shooting ourselves. Or is it part of the IBM conditions to buy the company?
No, we do not comment on rumors...

Say NO to IBM.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

A confederacy of dunces

It is the 40th anniversary of the death of John Kennedy Toole, the writer of the wonderful 'A Confederacy of Dunces', printed after his soon death and awarded with the Pulitzer price.
At Sun we are celebrating this event with several homages. For instance, many people has been wondering during this years which is the meaning of the 'I' in 'Jonathan I. Schwartz'. It means 'Ignatius', as the main character of the novel, 'Ignatius J. Really' (probably the 'J' means 'Jonathan' too).
The second homage is the set up of our own Confederacy of Dunces.
It is the only explanation of the selling plan of the company.

Say NO to IBM.

A day at the races

I'm just flying to Melbourne in the corporate jet (Jonathan is tired of flying to New York to plead IBM, so he left it parked for the week-end) to have a words with Sir Richard Branson (he is very fond of the sir thing, I have to remember calling him that in public: he'll laugh a little and tell me not to use is, but I know he loves that). How things changes. When I was CEO we were the ones sponsoring a F1 team (look at the mirrors of the car),
now I'm flying to meet Richard to ask him if he has about 6 billion in cash (I know he has much more) to avoid the IBM takeover.
Richard, are not you spending your money in the races? Spend a little on me, you can add your logo to all of our computers: free advertising of Virgin in major datacenters all around the World. Thing of it.
May the Marx's spirit be with me (Groucho, hear my plea and help me in this hard times).

Say NO to IBM.

Update: After winning their first race in F1 (one-two indeed), Brawn GP has fired 250 of its 700 employees. That's a way to celebrate... I don't know if I still want to do business with such people...

Friday, March 27, 2009

IBM-Sun talks could extend during next week

Yes, this is what is said in the rumor-sphere, and analysts seem surprised to see that the due-dilligence process would extend for at least a couple of weeks (a process we do not confirm nor deny, as we don't comment on market rumors). What do you think IBM is trying to buy, John's Bakery down the street? As you might imagine, a company like Sun is a little bit complex, with a huge number of contracts, licences and customers: and this is what IBM wants to be sure of, the real value of Sun, its customer base.
On the other hand, our internal CRM, ERP, BI, Whateve-You-Think-About, the infamous IBIS, is based on Oracle software... so you can imagine that trying to analyze anything stored inside this engender takes much more time than a couple of weeks (and I'm speaking of Johns Bakery, so go figure the time needed with Sun...).
Remember dear employees, we do not comment on market rumors (neither if the rumor is from Intel and says we -indeed SEMA and KKR- have been bitching around offering the company to anybody with some money).

Again, repeat after me: Sun do not comment on market rumors.
Say it again: NO to IBM, I mean, we do not comment on market rumors. Is that clear?

Real Scott McNealy: We'd forget your mistake choosing this Pony Tailed CEO if you take the company back. Why don't you ring Vinod, Andy and Bill and propose them to do something great, like in the old times, and buy the company back? I'm sure SEMA is willing to make you an interesting offer.

Meanwhile I'll keep on ringing Chambers to find an alternative salvation plan. I hope he's still running Cisco...

Monday, March 23, 2009

If the IBM merger succeeds...

Dear employees,

Just in case the merger with IBM happens to be more than a rumor, I just enclose here some useful information for that improbable, but not impossible, event.

Well, in my personal case I know what should have felt Luke Skywalker after Darth Vader told him "I'm your father". I guess that for you, dear employees, would be like if you are enrolled in the Rebel Alliance and then Princess Leia comes to tell you that the Empire has acquired all the shares of you revolution and now you all have been integrated in the Imperial Army... gasp!

Well, as I was telling you, here it is the most recent picture I have from the one that could become your boss: Mr. Palmisano (is an old one, when he took a more direct role in the projects leaded by IBM):

Oh, and here it is a picture of the IBM headquarters (don't use neutron bombs on it, consider it as 'home'):

In my next post I may talk about the new dress code at IBM, I've heard they've left blue for white.
I hope Ashok has not played with my photos as he used to do in the past...

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Of silences, facts and treason


Since the rumors started about IBM purchasing Sun in the sales store, nothing has been said by the management of the company.
The official policy here at Sun is not to comment on market rumors about our company, but this time I guess we should make an exception (even Jonathan's blog is being censored: no comments about the merger are allowed, and so his last post only shows a strange low number of just 9 comments).
The market has believed the rumor as a true fact, as a matter of time until the acquisition is completed (see this due diligenge report piece of news, or the growing number of articles talking about the subject). The best proof that the market is believing this is a fact is the rise in our stocks: nearly an 80%.

Jonathan, can you imagine the number of opportunities we are about to close competing against IBM in all our product lines?
Can you imagine the damage this FUD is making us in those opportunities?
Why would a customer buy a Sun product instead of an IBM one, if at last it will be the same company?

I never believed the many rumors about other companies buying Sun, but it is time to say something about it now, say that it is not true and everything will be fine again. In the past I've always agreed with this silence policy, but now is quite different, we could be even accused of rising the price of the shares with false rumors (if this is the case, why did not you do it before? You've seen the results in the stock price...).

Unless the rumor is not false. And this is the impression you are giving with your silence. And this is what everybody believes now.


There are a couple of major investors that now control the company: KKR and Southeastern Asset Management. KKR made an investment operation, too complicated for me to explain, so I'll give you a link to the press release where this was explained. At last, they are receiving a fine interest on the money they lent to Sun, and have the right to get their investment back in the form of shares, at about $7.50, so selling the company today at about
$10, and then wait until this shares are converted into IBM shares with a prevision to rise in the next years well beyond the initially expected outcome is quite a business, so I imagine that they may be for the agreement.

What puzzles me is the attitude of SEMA (you know, Southeastern Asset Management). They purchased a significant number of shares of Sun, making them the first investor in the company, but they did it by more than $10 a share (according to my information, they made significant investments between 9 and 16 dollars, probably most around the 16, just check the evolution of the stock price and the times when SEMA did the purchases of stocks). So, if they are the major stakeholder, they are the ones to be heard about making a deal to sell the company, and if they agree with IBM's offer, then they are assuming they are not able to take greater profit for their investments. This is weird for me, I don't believe they will sell for less than they bought, so we'll have to wait and see. Maybe this is why the took the reigns of the company, but in any case I think the price is not enough for them to even recover their investment.

Another fact is that the merger of the number 1 server maker with the number 4 (almost 3) server maker could be scrutinized by antitrust authorities in the US and in other countries. It would create a 'de facto' monopoly in the server market. I guess Hurd must be quite nervous, but not as nervous as people at Fujistu or even Michael Dell. If the deal is finally closed, Michael should think in who he is going to sell the company, and I guess IBM and HP will not be candidates anymore.

The feeling I have today is that the talks already begun long time ago, and that all the recent moves at the company were just oriented for its sale: the downsizing of 6,000 people, the reorganizing in three major departments (that would ease the selling of parts of the company to face an antitrust issue), so this past week's rumors and news seem to be just the final stage of the long time announced selling of Sun.

Another interesting fact is that Sun's shares rose to $8.10 at the end of the week, so the offer made by IBM is not a 100% plus anymore over the price of the shares. At least investors think that the company is valued more than this: Jonathan, the company is valued more than this. Even more, the company is viable, has fantastic products and the only thing we lack is advertising and sales reps (and a proper management team...).

Another fact is that I'm checking if (fake) Palmisano has a blog already and if I can get the name for whatever happens in the future...
I'm also buying a set of white short-sleeved shirts to match my grey suits (you know, the standard dress code at IBM).


Sun is not only the dream of four friends that built this company back in 1982. It is the dream of his 40,000 (no, now 35,000; no, 30,000) employees. Sun is in most cases not only a place to work, but a dream, a way of doing business, a way of loving computers, a place for engineers. When running a company you have to think not only in shareholders and customers, but also employees: they are not a company asset, they are the company itself, they are the spirit, the soul of what we do, and we must honor them and take care of them.

SEMA was announced as a 'long term investor', as someone to give stability and guidance to save the company and make it come back to past success. They were defined as an investor with a 'velvet glove reputation'. Now it seems their only intention is to get their money back as soon as possible and no matter what is the cost for Sun. If this was the reality, this would be a treason: they'd have lied to all of us.

After all the pain suffered by the employees, after the savage downsizing of employees, after everybody working harder than ever was seen in the history of computer companies to give Sun back to profitability, dog-fighting in every deal to win as much of them as possible and some more, if the board just gives up and sells the company, it would be a treason to every employee.

Jonathan, such an effort restructuring the company, creating the most advance portfolio in the computer market ever (with no marketing), sacrificing such a good people, swalloing MySQL and StorageTek and many more great companies, to just give it everything for a fistful of dollars to one of our worst enemies?
I'd consider that a treason, and not only to the people that appointed you to the post of CEO, to every customer that believed in Sun, to every employee that trusted you and gave part of its life to build the company.

No matter what happens from now on. You diluted the value of the company in a way nobody ever saw before. I'm cursing the day you became CEO.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Say no to IBM

I've just learned about the rumor (well, according to the rise of the shares, more than a rumor) that IBM is negotiating to buy Sun.
I only can say that I'll never sell my shares to IBM, and that I'll vote against this in the board (if they have the nerve to ask me). I'd really rather be selling to company to Micro$oft...
Yes, I admit that I've been talking to Netle's CEO to offer him the company, but this is for the sake of the people working here and to keep the dream we built along this years. Selling the company to IBM would mean the end of the dream, the death of Sun, as a company and as a spirit. IBM is only interested in two things: the installed base (our customers), and Java, and are most interested in the second thing, Java, to cut the grass under HP's feet. You know what I mean, HP is stronger than ever after buying EDS, so if they control Java (IBM), they'll have a strong argument to sell the bodies, I mean, the professional services they are both competing to sell. Otherwise, there is not a diferentiator in both offerings.
Make no mistake: IBM is not a technology company any more, they sell people, so if the technology doesn't work it is much better for them because this way they sell more services. And HP is willing to enter this market too.
Sun always represented a different choice: to reach the customers by providing leading edge technology to save costs. If we sell ourselves to IBM, all the innovation will be lost, as they are only interested in selling people (as I said, the worst the technology works, the more man-hours they sell to make projects work). If we sell ourselves to IBM, would be like selling our souls to the Devil, and so our souls might burn forever in the Hell of the abandoned cool technolohgy companies (like Netscape, Digital, Compaq, SeeBeyond....).

By the way, the one in the right int he picture is the Devil. The other one in the left is Jonathan with his Scientology celebration dress.

I hope this is just a bad dream, and that we'll all wake up and forget about this stupid subject. Perhaps is the influence over Jonathan of the old use our campus had in the past...

So, say NO to IBM. Post in Jonathan's blog, phone to your sales reps. saying that you'll never buy anything from Sun (and IBM) if the selling is done. Say NO to IBM, and over all, phone Steve Jobs: Steve, Apple-Sun is a great idea, and we'll keep your logo, please, give me a call.
Ok, ok, Ballmer is also invited to the bid... MicroSun is also a better idea than just dismanteling the company to just keep Java.

Say NO to IBM.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Flash Gordon

Sorry, I was gonna write something funny about the new flash-driven servers we are launching, but I got blinded by the logo...Next time, I'll be back, with a pair of Sunglasses...

Friday, March 6, 2009

Again: HP is NOT buying Sun

Just a while ago Hurd (the CEO of Hurd Practicioners, or HP for most of you), telling me, again, they are not buying us: 'apart from the reasons you say in your blog entry, which are basically true, you forgot to mention that there is no reason to buy something when we'll get it for free if we just wait enough time..." That is what he said. And that he wouldn't hire neither Jonathan nor me in the future.
I'm gonna play some hockey.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

HP is NOT buying Sun

I've spent a few days in the Mobile World Congress (I'll talk about Java FX in another post), and just when I got back I had to go to see our friend Hurd (in the picture he is telling me the size of a fish he captured in Ellison's ship, or was he telling me the amount of money they were loosing in the first quarter...?) to sign the agreement by which HP is distributing Solaris in (some of) their Pro-Liant servers (or Pro-Lier servers, as we like to call them at home).
So, many rumors have been spreaded away about HP buying Sun. This is old stuff, they begun when Don Grantham left the company to join HP a while ago, and now are back with this HP agreement.
I'll tell you why HP is not buying Sun:

1. We are not selling Sun (at least not me, and if I was doing it, I wouldn't tell you, I assure you that).
2. HP is not the most voted company to buy Sun according to my poll. If I had to talk to another CEO would be the one from Nestlé (but he is not answering my phone calls...).
3. They spent all the money buying EDS, they have no more cash and no bank is going to give it to them (cause banks is the last place where you can find money now).
4. This is the most important one: there are no synergies at all between both companies:
-They have their own operating system, HP-UX and we have Solaris (ok, they killed HP-UX and now it is a kind of zombie after being revived, so they have no enterprise/Unix-like O.S. at all).
-We have our own line of servers (I know, the CMT would be appealing for a hardware and CPU manufacturer)
-We have our own line of storage (yes, many of our storage is OEM hardware from HP)
-They don't have middleware (we have web server, app. server, identity management, e-mail, and they don't have any of these)
-We don't have consultants (they just bought EDS)
Maybe THERE ARE synergies after all. Well, I treated Don well when he was at Sun. I think I'm calling him to see how is he doing...

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Getting tired of this pic...

Jonathan, seriously, I'm getting tired of the use (better said, the abuse) of this pic... It's about the tenth time you use it to illustrate our financial results (well, your comments about our financial results). At least you could explain what the 'a' and the 'b' mean, and where are we at Sun. And don't let it to our own imagination...

After the huge rise in the price of our shares last week (5.76 in the after hours), I guess this is a much more appropriate picture this time:

And I'm saving this one for the day I can exercise my stock options (it's near, the shares only have to rise to $80):

Well, maybe not so near, Ashok just reminded me that I have to re-calculate my stocks after last year's reverse split. Thanks so much, Ashok, you know how to cheer me up...

Friday, February 6, 2009

New member aboard!

I mean, we have a new member of the board, by appointment of our beloved investors Southeastern Asset Management. Some people have been showing some reluctance to the election of Rahul to the board, as he served in the past in Fannie Mae and Merril Lynch. Hey, what's up to you boys? Everybody has a past, and I'd rather a man with a past than someone with no experience... and Merril Lynch was not that bat at last, they managed to sell it to Bank of America. Maybe we need someone like Rahul... (or maybe not, the shares are going high today!!!).
Anyway, I didn't choose him, it was just a request from Southeastern, so if everything goes wrong, it is not my fault...

Announcing the McNealy Master in Business and Hockey Administration

At last my talent to manage and hire brilliant people has been recognized! Most of the CEOs in the technology companies have been trained by me (somehow). Indeed I only made one single mistake along all those years... Guess who? Well, so I decided to launch a Master in Business and HR administration, where hockey and golf will be two of the compulsory subjects to be studied. Enrollment will be announced soon. Stay tuned.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

We are losing but wining...

Yesterday we posted our second quarter results. It seems that we lost $209M, so I went to see my friend Lehman (he insists that he is not one of the brothers, but I'm not so sure now...), so he could explain to me what that meant. Apparently we sold much more than analysts expected, but we still lost money, because we had to include $222M due to 'restructuring expenses'. It is: severance payments.
The math is easy: 222 - 209 = 13. So, by not firing anyone, we could have spent $13M in advertising and we would have finished the quarter in break even (if not selling much more on account on the adverts). Funny. I then asked Lehman what was next, if we should start shooting in our own feet. He's thinking about it and will send me a memo as soon as possible.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Obama counts on Sun

As you may already know, President Obama has asked me to prepare a paper on open source software for the new administration. Even the Brittons are aware of such amazing piece of news!
Heard that, Jonathan? He asked me, ME, to give advice, but worry not: the first point in my paper will be to open source the job of the first CIO of the history of the USA (we'll see if this is the way we can get rid of... I mean, that Jonathan will reach such a prominent post to serve our Country, although as you can read in the article from the BBC there are some people, wrong people, that believe this post is not useful).

Thanks to Computer Weekly, I really like the picture they used for their article. The one from the BBC is not bad either, but I like it most. It makes me younger...

Remember my words: "Open source does not require you to pay a penny to Microsoft or IBM or Oracle or any proprietary vendor any money." It is, you don't have to pay Microsoft, IBM or Oracle: you have to pay Sun, the only and truly Open Source Company! We will charge much less to the Government, and the company will be saved, so this is a win-win situation!
And when I say open source I mean Software (obviously) and hardware (see Jonathan's blog).

Being a Republican who supported Hillary, I'm really liking the new President. Live to tell!

Sun acquires Q-Layer

I know it is not precisely fresh news, but I have received a couple of questions about this recently.
Sun acquires Q-Layer, in a period where Jonathan has announced layoffs, we still make investments buying new companies. Might seem contradictory, so I asked Jonathan to stop the layoffs and read my blog to solve the situation at Sun, but you never know.
Anyhow, the most repeated question is how much did we spend buying this company, as in the press release it didn't say a number and only included a rather cryptic phrase: 'The terms of the deal were not disclosed as the transaction is not material to Sun'. Well, I find it pretty clear: the transaction is not material, is just spiritual to Sun. Like cloud computing: just a spirit, a ghost, a buzzword... (well, as soon as I learn what is cloud computing I'll be posting about it).

Kennedy is back to the White House.

No, I'm not out of my mind. I know that Barack Obama is the new President of The United States, but after hearing his inaugural speech I had the feeling that he didn't said that we should 'not think about what our country can do for us, but think what we can do for our country' because it was already used. And seeing the expectation of this innauguration (even Ballmer is putting money for the parties!), somehow I have the feeling that Kennedy, or his spirit, is back to the USA.

I recognize that I was for Hillary and I think that we still have to see how he manages all the challenges in his presidency. Despite of that I confess I also have great expectations in Obama's term: I truly hope he will choose Jonathan as CIO of the USA... so we can get rid of him and stop the layoffs when I get back to manage Sun.

Mr. President, welcome to the Office, and good luck. You have a tremendous challenge in front of you, but you know you can count with the American People. And with me too.